Little Mermaid's Happily Ever After

The lunch gong resonated throughout the castle. A gangly redhead flew down the winding marble staircase. Ariel, ravenous from an morning of learning to wear toe socks (the idea of having an “individual sock for each toe” amused her to no end), was exceptionally eager to sample the loopy Royal Cook’s culinary delights.

Seating herself at the dining table, Ariel resisted the urge to run the entrée for through her hair. She now knew there was a similar device known as a “comb” for that. How intriguing these humans were.

She beamed at Eric (her husband). “So. What’s for eats, sweetheart?” she asked. “I’m starving!”

“A favorite of mine, I asked the cook to prepare it specially today!”

Just then, a stiff-looking waiter in a heavily starched tuxedo placed a large platter of rice rolls on the table. To Ariel’s surprise, her fork and spoon were taken away and she was presented with two wooden sticks. She smiled at the waiter. “Its okay, I only need one!” she said, hading one stick back to him. She selected a rice roll topped with what seemed to be orange beads and stabbed it viciously before devouring it with gusto.

“Gawsh Erick! Ish DEE-LEE-SHOS! (delicious)” she exclaimed through a mouthful of rice. Swallow. “What’s it called?”

Eric swallowed his rice roll, too. “This? This, my dear, is sushi. A Japanese rice roll. That one you just ate is…uh…was topped with Ikura.” Seeing Ariel’s confused look, Eric hastened to elaborate. “Ikura. That’s Japanese for “salmon roe” or salmon eggs.”

Ariel’s eyes widened and she began to pale. “S-salmon…roe? OH MY GOSH I JUST ATE SALMON EGGS?!” she stared at the stray “beads” left on her plate. She looked like she had just eaten a baby. “I used to have a pet salmon!” and with that, Ariel ran over to a potted palm and promptly threw up.

Ignoring the housekeeper’s shrieks, Ariel wiped her mouth. “I can’t believe you just made me eat that! You KNOW I was once half-fish! How could you! OH GOSH IS THAT EEL MEAT ON THE SUSHI??!” Ariel tried to swallow the bile that was rising in her throat. What had been a cheerful meal seemed now looked like the morgue after her friends’ mass murder. She glared at Eric. “You KNOW I can’t tolerate seafood cuisine! I thought I made myself very clear after the MacDonald’s’ Fish Burger incident?!”

“But….”

“SHUT UP! And what’s more, I SAW you with that Bikini Blonde down by the pier yesterday. I SAW you come out of that dodgy Sea Salt bar! Don’t lie to me, I saw what you both did!” Eric began to sweat, but Ariel was already working herself into a rage.

“YOU THREW YOUR RUBBISH INTO THE SEA! You POLLUTED it!” Ariel shook with fury. “You REPULSE me!” and with that she, stalked off to vent her anger on some innocent toe socks. When Ariel was safely out of hearing range, Eric breathed a sigh of relief. If she stayed in her room all day, perhaps he could sneak down to The Sea Salt again this evening….

*a slightly more..matured plot. i doubt anyone will understand.